toomuch'stash Escribi�:

whirlygirl Escribi�:

Oh, and for the record, the sex does not die when you get married. I am of the opinion it gets better and better. But I'll let stash speak for himself. }:-)

Oh please, like I can remember anything from 12+ years ago to compare it too. I can't even remember what I had for dinner last night.



you know I'm kidding.



actually, my sex life is so amazingly spectacular that the only reason I don't brag about it on here is cuz Whirly is shy. and I don't want anyone chasing my woman. but she is the proverbial 'Super Freak' that rick james sang about.

that's because she never had a real man, like me

Oh, err. Yeah. stash and Slipvin bring it up a notch, I am da freak.



Anyway.



I am glad that you are working your way through this Darkstar and most importably doing what works best for you. I think your ex is looking for validation and comfort which is probably why your phone's been ringing off the hook - this (from a girlie perspective) is understandable. But if her friends are smart they will advise her to sit back, take time to let things sink in, and lay low for a while like you are planning on doing. Like I said before, you and your ex will be just fine. Seperate, but fine.



We're here for you, man!



((((group hug for Tim))))

I think it's mostly fear that we're both making a mistake, a thought I won't pretend hasn't passed through my mind. But I think we both owe it to ourselves to see this one out. We both felt strongly enough about it that we decided to break up.



If, months or longer down the line, we come to the conclusion that maybe we could get back together, well that's that then. But right now I think time apart with a sense of permanence is best for both of us. It'll be good for her to focus on her career (she just finished university and started a good-paying career) and for me to focus on school (which I've become really passionate about).



There will definetly be some lonely days and nights and I will miss the phone calls at 11 PM on nights we didn't spend together and so many other things, but while it's important to remember these things, it's equally important not to hold onto them too tightly, I suppose.

benjam Escribi�:

stash i totally agree with you!

a relationship in my eyes cannot be taken seriously until teenage hormones are completely out of the picture. I thought I was in love a couple of years back, but in hindsight i realise i was just struck by lust.

being single teaches you alot about yourself, and if the right person comes along take it sure, but i dont get people that go out searching for a relationship, they just force themselves into something that may not be natural.

1 night stands are great to get your frills, as long as you wrap up warm theres no probs at all. i dont see why they are damned by some people. theyre better than bouncing from 1 relationship to the next fucking up peoples emotions!

theres my 2 cents

-peace x

WDF are you? LOL



Dark good luck in your new single life.



I�m alone right now and probably is for the best.

Darkstarexodus Escribi�:

There will definetly be some lonely days and nights and I will miss the phone calls at 11 PM on nights we didn't spend together and so many other things, but while it's important to remember these things, it's equally important not to hold onto them too tightly, I suppose.

ah man, we'll call you late at night.

toomuch'stash Escribi�:

Darkstarexodus Escribi�:

There will definetly be some lonely days and nights and I will miss the phone calls at 11 PM on nights we didn't spend together and so many other things, but while it's important to remember these things, it's equally important not to hold onto them too tightly, I suppose.

ah man, we'll call you late at night.

Thanks, dude, but I'm taking this both better and worse than I thought I would. Although it weighs on my mind a fair bit, I'm not all choked up and emotional all day and night.



I don't want to sound callous though and act like it was easy, nothing at all, etc., because it wasn't. (Especially because she's been known to read the board on occasion. X-D ) She'll always have a special place in my heart, as I'm sure I will in hers, but I really do feel that at this point in time this was best for both of us and that things will work out fine.



Time will tell what happens in the future, but I think I'm able to reminisce fondly and still look ahead to the future with excitement. It helps having a very busy school and workload and the indoor soccer season starts soon, too.

Darkstarexodus Escribi�:

Time will tell what happens in the future, but I think I'm able to reminisce fondly and still look ahead to the future with excitement. It helps having a very busy school and workload and the indoor soccer season starts soon, too.

*I* can tell you what'll happen in the future, and yeah, j00 got every reason to look ahead with excitment:







I am so going to hell.

(((((((((((((((( Tim ))))))))))))))))



I didn't have much time to read all the replies , but here's my 2 cents.





WHirly is so right. From a girls perspective it's a totally different thing. I can truly say that i've been in love and loved somebody with my whole heart without all my hormones flying around. I wanted something steady and i gave myself a 100 % ........ However......I'm single now for 2 years. Do i like it ?! Yes and no. I like it because with the life i am living it's hard to keep up a relationship. I hate it because i am a very passionate and romantic person and i would LOVE to have a boyfriend right now.

How you're gonna cope with this is totally up to you and you're personality.Some people like to be single , some people don't. Bottomline is , you're gonna have to get used to it again. Changes ate difficult.



All i can say is - " Having a break " is fucking bullshit. It's a sign things aren't the way they should be...having a break is just an easy solution but the problem usually lies much deeper than that. 90% " having a break " Results in actually breaking up. If i were you Tim , i would really say that it's a definite end. No "break" bullshit , but make the discision. After 6 years you owe that to her and to yourself. I remember from previous posts you weren't always happy in this relationship ....



How people deal with it is different with every personalty. You might be fine now but you can still get the shock 3 months from now. Like what happend to me , kind off. I just hope you stick to youre discision and it won't be unnescesary painfull !!!



But good on you , Tim. Being stuck in a relation that doesn't feel right anymore is one of the worse things.



And - to add a little TooMuchStashy in here - Now you can finally go to all those parties and NYE !!! Without you're gf being a problem ;-)

ahhhh tim-bob so you have finally entered the realm of the single man.



is def gonna be weird for the next couple of months - readjustment always takes a bit of time. but you know in your head and your heart whats right for you, even if it doesn't feel like it at the time.



chin up chap, go out with your mates and take stash's advice - plenty of pro's in no long term commitment ;)



its been years sine my last serious relationship - its been a combination of awkward lifestyle (weekend raving/partying/dj'ing might lead to ahem a bit of action but is not ideal for finding that someone really special), continually moving about over the country so its hard to put down roots, wanting something i cant have, and also being in the comfot zone - im pretty happy right now, most my needs are fulfilled a lot of the time, i can do what i want when i want etc and ive got years ahead of me for serious shit.



so enjoy it man, do all the stuff you couldnt do before and see how it goes and how you feel. :)

I'd just thought i'd up this thread.



How are you doing , Dark !?!

Overall? Really, really good. Should have done this a LONG time ago. I don't want back at all. I'm a far better, far happier, far healthier person than probably at any time in my life. Certainly than anytime in the past 5 years.



On the other hand, her current MSN sig is "loving the single life!!!!" and for whatever reason that is bothering me a bit right now. I was intentionally not putting messages like that up because I didn't want to hurt her. I'm glad she's happy, but if she's out there being all the things I always wished she could be, I'll be a little bit bitter because if she had been willing to compromise more I think we still could be together. I long held the opinion that she gave more of herself to others than she ever did to me (I did the same, I suppose, but gave more of myself to her than I received in return).



We still haven't talked, but I did send her an MSN message the other day. I received no reply. I'll probably phone her in a day or two, maybe tomorrow night. I'd like to get in touch, see how she's really do, give her back a few things I've found, and see if I can get my $300 that she owes me.



Looking forward, I haven't really done much on the dating scene because school's been really busy and I haven't had much time for anything else. I've got a few prospects (what else is new?), but the one I was probably most interested in has a new boyfriend, but I'm not sure that really matters. *shrug* I'm in no hurry for a new relationship, but this celibacy thing is beginning to get to me a little. I mean, it's not like I was having sex when I was in a relationship, but I could do with a little bit now to do me over.



Anyways, girls, girls, girls. They're everywhere, and life is good. Can't wait to get exams out of the way in December and have a great holiday season.

I don't get people who put like really personal stuff in their msn nicknames. But that's just my opinion ;)



Hey i'm glad youre loving it man!

Reason why i was asking an update is cause these are big things in youre life, You never know how things are gonna end up. You might have had horrible regret !! But i'm glad you're living the single life 100 % :D



Rock on Timbo!

Jeanie Escribi�:

I don't get people who put like really personal stuff in their msn nicknames. But that's just my opinion ;)

Thats so annoying- then you ask whats up and people say things like ''Man it aint none of your business!''



Im always left thinkin, why the fuck did you put it where everyone can see 'Mr.Invite-Everyone-Into-Your-Life'



:P



Thats not aimed at anyone or anything I didnt even read the rest of the topic I only see what Jeanie said :P

Her whole "loving the single life" is probably a bit of social camoflauge in my opinion. How you're feeling is understandable... I do hope you can finally move on good and once and for all after you've gotten your money back and she's gotten the last of her things.



You're rockin, Tim. You've got lots going for you and you're focused and driven. The ladies will present themselves in due time!

Thanks everyone. My only regret is that I didn't pull the trigger a year ago. I realize now just how unhappy I was for so long and how there was no way it could have worked out.



Things are sliding nicely into place. And in short order, I may be able to be an asshole and have an MSN sig of "better girl, better car, better life". But I won't, because I'm not that kind of jerk. ;-)

Nah mate dont do that

That is so childish !!

I was only joking. I wouldn't do that, tempting as it may be.

You should put up something like 'my life makes sense again 'cos I got rid of the b*tch'! Yeah, I'm childish (call me Mike), but nothing like a sweet revenge, muhuwhahaha! }:-)

A laugh a minute around here. Genuinely bemused.



Finally called her last night, left a polite voicemail message explaining why I hadn't been in touch, said I had a few things of hers lying around, that she had a tape of mine I thought, and that with the holiday season coming up I was going to need soon the money she owes me. Asked her to call, or if that was uncomfortable, text, e-mail, MSN, whatever, and we could hopefully hook up for a coffee and a chat in the next day or two.



No response back last night. Left my MSN online while I watched Layer Cake, knew she was home and online for at least an hour or two. No message. No call, no message today. Figured, "alright, she's doing parent-teacher conferences these two days, maybe she just doesn't want an emotional situation to deal with". Fair play, that's why I didn't contact her until after midterms were done.



Parent-teacher ended tonight and her MSN sig is back to "loving the single life!!". Still no contact. I'm not expecting any either.



I love maturity.



I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and not call again until tomorrow. I really am hoping to be civil and cordial and actually maybe have a decent, productive chat. I'm thinking the odds on that are somewhat long. Hopefully I'm wrong.



I'm really amused by all this. Who knew the moral high road was the one less travelled?

She must be loving that single life since she's obviously too busy being wined and dined by her many suitors to have time giving you back the money she owes.



If that is the way she's playing, if that is how she wants to be then you may have kissed your money goodbye...



If you don't hear from her, take what little things she has left in your possession and mail them to her. Or kick em to the curb with next week's trash. And be done. I am sorry Darkstar. :(