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I am in love with...
#10 toomuchstash
Posted 23 January 2006 - 11:37 PM
Great review:
In 2003, Georgia-based publisher White Wolf, Inc. sued Sony, claiming that the studio's new film Underworld infringed on various White Wolf role-playing games dealing with vampires and werewolves. Hotly contested among a tiny subsection of geeks and ignored by the rest of the world, the lawsuit ultimately quietly disappeared, reportedly settled out of court, but it was hard to argue that Underworld didn't bear a strong resemblance to White Wolf's games?and more significantly, to the rawest kind of wish-fulfillment RPG, with a couple of glowering, �ber-skilled badasses pounding through an endless horde of faceless enemies, periodically pausing for lengthy bouts of exposition, clich�d revelations, and a by-the-numbers ego-feeding romance.
The new sequel Underworld: Evolution is essentially another module in that same game; it takes up right where the first one left off, takes the exact same tone, assumes (probably rightly) that only the hardcore Underworld fanatics bothered to turn up, and caters to them all the way. Underworld director Len Wiseman returns to the helm, churning out more choppy, sped-up, Blade-style combat and pretty pre-combat compositions. His wife Kate Beckinsale is back as the leather-clad vampire assassin who's discovered dark truths about her lineage; Scott Speedman is back as her newly converted vampire/werewolf hybrid lover. Both are on the run from the thoroughly annoyed winged super-vamp (Tony Curran) revived in the final scene of Underworld. Loose plot threads are addressed and new plot threads are introduced at a dizzying rate, with a seriously slumming Derek Jacobi ultimately emerging as a link between Curran and a ginormous super-werewolf who have unfinished business from 800 years back.
There's a ton of backstory behind Underworld: Evolution, which gets slightly denser and rowdier than its predecessor, but it's ultimately all in the service of a nigh-endless series of numbing, mechanical battles in which snarling protagonists and CGI monsters shoot, claw, and bloodily eviscerate each other. In other words, it's Underworld, but more of it. Like role-playing games, the Underworld films are a highly specialized taste, and those who've acquired it know who they are. Everyone else should give this one a wide berth.
#11
Posted 23 January 2006 - 11:39 PM
toomuch'stash Escribi�:
Whirly won't let me go see Underworld 2.
:(
Awwww.
I guess I should've read a bit more into your comments of "wow, that looks lame!!" when watching the trailers. I should know by now that no means yes and yes means no.
Of course you're allowed to see it, don't be silly. X-D
be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle
#12 toomuchstash
Posted 23 January 2006 - 11:49 PM
#14
Posted 24 January 2006 - 2:54 AM
toomuch'stash Escribi�:
Angelina's b00bs & unshorn beaver
http://www.gorillamask.net/aj2.shtml
So how many of you are going to run out and rent Gia this evening? X-D
be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle
#15
Posted 24 January 2006 - 2:58 AM
whirlygirl Escribi�:
toomuch'stash Escribi�:
Angelina's b00bs & unshorn beaver
http://www.gorillamask.net/aj2.shtml
So how many of you are going to run out and rent Gia this evening? X-D
I won't............. I'll just download the divx
#16 toomuchstash
Posted 24 January 2006 - 6:05 AM
Ben_j Escribi�:
whirlygirl Escribi�:
toomuch'stash Escribi�:
Angelina's b00bs & unshorn beaver
http://www.gorillamask.net/aj2.shtml
So how many of you are going to run out and rent Gia this evening? X-D
I won't............. I'll just download the divx
Link please
#18
Posted 24 January 2006 - 9:53 AM
toomuch'stash Escribi�:
Angelina's b00bs & unshorn beaver
http://www.gorillamask.net/aj2.shtml
Access Denied (content_filter_denied)
Your request was denied because of its content categorization: "Adult Content;Adult Material"
For assistance, contact your network support team.
awwww shit :?
#20
Posted 24 January 2006 - 3:55 PM
there was a movie out couple of years ago with angelina and antonio bandares...something sin...she looked sizzeling HOT in that movie. Her body,lips,those BEA-utiful eyes... i should have never started Jolie appreciation thread.yeah as a major Angelina Jolie fan i have seen Gia couple of times..the movie sux but who the hell was following the story anyways. i think she is pregnant now with Brad Pitt's baby.FCUK!!!
I still have a shot with Keira.
I still have a shot with Keira.