I don't feel like writing a monster post of what happened in the last two weeks or why I have been absent.

http://i54.photobuck...male_mx/Ely.jpg

I can't stop thinking about her (she is my best friend),my stomach hurts it feels horrible and

I might have a problem with depression... ;(

any tips or sugesstions from the people with experience on this type of circumstances?

dude, if you really love this girl, just let it alone. Drink heavily, until you can't feel feelings anymore (but do NOT leave long, drunken messages on her cell phone) and then, one day, if you and her were meant to be, she'll be done with the other guy, and you can be there for her. voila!

Important thing to remember tho', once you start drinking, don't stop.

Aww mx! Love can hurt so bad, can't it??

I have to agree with what my husband said (though I wouldn't suggest becoming a drunk because that'll just look desperate and pathetic). If she's your best friend, just be a man and be there for her though the good and bad. Be her friend, like you've always been her friend. It's hard when you've got these feelings but it can be done. What's meant to be is meant to be and you have to realize - as much as it's painful - that she might not come around. But then what's meant to be is meant to be, and she just might come around. But it won't be tomorrow, it won't be next week - these things take time, it could be a while... so you just have to brace yourself, hang in there, be strong and love the friendship you already have.

ah dude that sucks. your love life now sounds alot like a tragedy. I remember going through that. however the lack of love life in my life (going on a year and a half) is more comdey now.... It's actually a bad running joke....I've been using to many greek metaphors lately.

I agree with makeskidskill, but in my eyes cut all contact off with her. If your going to get through this you can't still be in touch with her. It's going to rip your insides out thinking about the next guy she's with, weather or not she was interested in them when she was still with you. What that other guy has that you don't. Being around her, watching her fall for someone else is the ultimate torture.

Theres going to be feelings between you still for a long time and if it's in your hearts you'll probably still have dreams with eachother in for months.

If you can cut yourself off from her for a time, and start building yourself up a new life, start kicking with new friends etc, you'll start feeling better and realising that maybe it wasn't ment to be. She might end up wondering how your doing so well, and rialise she wants you. Or you might bump in to her one day, randomly and all the feelings will come rushing back to her and... well... who knows. If shes your best friend she still will be when you've (want to or not) gotten over her

I was in the same situation once and never spoke to her for 10months. I bumped into her one day and as I said everything came rushing back to us and we had another spell together.

Try to make yourself a fresh start as quick as possible, concentrate on work...spend lots of time with other friends...and party! You need to make yourself happy because you'll feel like no one else will.

I can't really reply, i'm really busy with work.

But i went trough a similar thing. I don't have any words for you " this is what you should do " " this is what you shouldn't do " but i cna only tell you that one day you wake up and your feeling happy again. Believe me!

Lots of hugs for you!

This also happened to me and I ws heartbroken from 2003 right up untill I met my new love in 2005, everyday gets easier, just keep busy, hang out with friends do things you enjoy doing, as often as you can. It will hurt for a long time but hang in there. I may write a more in depth thing after work....hang in there dude!

Just so you don't feel alone on this I'll let you know about my last year.

When I was 18 and about to leave the Navy, I didn't go because fell in love with a beautiful, and I mean the most beautiful girl you've ever seen (pic here http://i56.photobuck...9_g1F_5EB2d.jpg ). We did everything together for over 3 years, we were each others lives. All we ever wanted was to just be close to each other, counting down hours to seeing each other. I remember I'd come home on an evening and be surprised with a little present. You know, just out of no where she'd lets say pick up a post card of the chems if she was out somewhere knowing that I love them. And when she'd been at work I'd nip out and find make-up and jewellery she'd like and have that waiting for when she'd finish. We went through everything together. There was a few times very in the relationship I left her but she'd always fight to show me how special we were together and she made me realise how much I loved her. We were so happy together, literally every time we were together every problem we faced in our own lives would go away, just with a hug.

My Mum battled with alcoholism and eventually passed 4 months ago. Watching her deteriorate destroyed me. Over last x-mas Arguments between me and Rose increased and she began to hate my mum because of the state I was in. Rose didn't want to see it as a disease and as I've realised wanted to leave me. For another person I don't know. She started to fall out with me over nothing. This one time she told my friends, one of her friends was gay. It then got round everyone in the village and she left me for everyone knowing. In January, when Mum was in hospital I was told she was going to die. Rose didn't want to see me that night because she wanted to get stoned. All the years of love between us and being told my mum was going to die was devastating. She put off seeing me for a week after that. Mum pulled through, and Rose left me for the final time not too weeks after. The last time I saw her, she said to me she wanted us to spend more time together. I couldn't believe it, my heart was set on gaining my love back. As she left she blew my bonus from work and told me that she wished my mum was dead, and how much of a horrible woman she was and Mum didn't love me etc

I blamed my mum for the end of my relationship, and gave her a hard time up until 2 weeks before she died. I didn't realise Rose planned on leaving me. I wasted Mums last 5 months alive, I could of been there more and treated her better. I've gone off the rails worrying that I hurt mum because of Rose and me. My auntie told me the last time she spoke to mum, mum said how much she loved me.

I still have dreams of Rose and she's with another guy. I never spoke to her after we split up and 2 months ago she sent me a SMS saying "Ha ha your mums dead" because of something my brother said to her.

I don't understand how I can hate Rose so much yet miss her and still dream of her. I know deep in me she still dreams of me and thinks of me, she's bound to with us being such massive parts of each others lives. Everywhere I look around here I look and see something we did in that place. I don't know how to start moving on. I fear that missing Rose is fucking wrong for what she's said and done to me.

At the minute I hate her for destroying my love, my trust and my last months with mum. But as I say keep dreaming about her... Its sending me mad!

I know this won't really help you but your not alone with love problems... Just try keep your chin up, keep busy, talk to friends, take everyday as it comes and keep well!

I found the best thing to do is not to post your problems on a forum, because when you recover and read this post it will leave you feeling embarrased, and homo like.

I find Kenny Loggins: Danger Zone, gets me through hard times. I can't really do a proper 80's dance right now because i've hurt my back.

pwned!

Hey iguana, nice lighthearted take on this subject, but if you have ever been there before it is a living hell. I feel that this forum should be open to discuss problems we have, we should all be about helping each other. When I had my first brekup in 2003, I never had the luxury of a forum with such fantastic and supportive people in it. I wouldn't think twice about sharing my problems on this forum, I'd have no worries about 'feeling homo' either! I can see how some people may be to proud and lock up their feelings because 'I'm a man', but a problem shared is a problem halfed.

Right I'm going to stop there as Jeremy Kyle maybe looking for a new job Monday!

Mx, hang in there buddy, and keep us posted on how your coping, we are all here for you! :-)

VMan me ol' mate, I have been through it before so I can laugh at it. Plus I think what got me through it was laughter, going down the pub with mates and not necessarily joining in with conversation but just listening in helps. I don't take a lot of things seriously, it's better to laugh them off.

Don't get to in touch with your feelings please, like telling me how you cried yourself to sleep, that kind of shit I do not want to hear, and we will no longer be friends.

Take her to the chems gig and she is all yours. Trust.

pah, what rubbish you speak Chemicalreaction. I suppose I shouldn't be suprised. Women don't like good music! What kind of a crazy world do you live in?

haha too true^

with exceptions to the few ladies on the forum.

I object on behalf of Whirlygirl and Jeanie! Unless you are trying to say they are not women? dun dun dun

There are always exceptions to the rule, which those two are. But that's it! No other women, ever, like good music. I'm always asking people what music they're into and women always respond in the same way "Yeah I like Kayne West most of time, and the rest of the time when i'm chillin with my g's I listen to Avril Lavine, I don't care what people say, that album is deep."

Lol its not that women don't like good music its just that women don't like music nerds. Like us guys like to collect cds, fan booklets, dvds, etc...women just like something with nice beat and easily to sing along lyrics. They don't give a shit about the detailed layers or trivial shit about the bands. They don't talk about that stuff like us guys do!

surface to air, thats horrible...and I feel for ya too Mx

They only gf I ever got attached to, was my first when I was 16. Like a young idiot, I became obsessed and ruined the whole thing. Of course I was heartbroken and didnt get over it for a long while. But ever since then I've never taken a relationship seriously, and I couldnt be happier. I feel that no girl, especially when you're younger, is worth all the bull shit.

Sure, the sex is great and she can make you feel like a million dollars. But damn, that bitch can suck you dry of your dignity within an instance.

I have never met a girl that I would like to shag that would enjoy shagging to Mezzanine or Dig Your Own Hole, and I never will. FACT. I wouldn't be able to get it up if she put on Pink's 'greatest' (s)hits. Stick on Daft Punks Discovery and i'll be going harder, better, stronger faster - just how she likes it.

Oh and MX. Hate is the key to survival. Hate her, don't befriend her, it just makes it harder. The voodoo, who-do-what-you-don't-dare-do people