inchemwetrust, on 08 February 2011 - 01:00 PM, said:

Bummer man. Just remember to breathe.

Lots of things going on for me right now and I'm pretty exhausted. I feel like I'm being pulled in a number of different directions and I'm stuck in the past in at least one thing. The good news is that I also feel like I'm making absolute progress and despite the recurring shark dreams (threatening animal lurking beneath the surface), I am seeing changes that need to be made and instituting a good amount of self-control.

D.C. may very well be a reality this summer... [dot] [dot] [dot]

The Twelves were great, but they weren't as good as the sets I'd seen from them last year. They did, however, work in The Chems in their set, as always, with A Modern Midnight Conversation. It was a great moment where I was dancing with my girlfriend on the dancefloor, and I start hearing some familiar lyrics. "Listen to your heaaaaaaaaart..." Fucking fantastic moment.

Unfortunately, my heart isn't entirely with my current girlfriend, so the notion of not running away isn't one that I can entirely agree with. Maybe it can work the other way around. Don't run away -with her-... HA!

Seriously though, for the moment, I have nothing to complain about and I wish you all the best. Nothin' but love from this Chem fan to all you out there struggling with... well... whatever. Relationships. Family. Work. Friends. Money. Happiness.

Keep the faith.

<3

A Modern Midnight Conversation?

MadPooter, on 09 February 2011 - 11:36 AM, said:

I'm stuck in the past in many things. (mostly personal habits which will never die) I've been having dreams recently on serving others with my own goodwill and kindness (not that i'm an ass in real life) I feel that these changes have to come in order for me to be more happier than I am right now, but it comes with some sacrifice (and I hate sacrificing...it's torture!)

MadPooter, on 09 February 2011 - 11:36 AM, said:

We can see them on the 16th!

MadPooter, on 09 February 2011 - 11:36 AM, said:

Did you say fart!

Let her know what's up! If it don't feel right, then move on! She's probably planning the 'move in' and hiding the 'Modern Bride' mag!

MadPooter, on 09 February 2011 - 11:36 AM, said:

Same to you my friend!
(Though I struggle the thought that my W2 hasn't came in my mail.....YET.....while everyone else got theirs! Kind of wanted to get my taxes sorted quickly for the quickie refund.)

I am struggeling big time with all of the above (except friends and family) but i always keep the faith!

Tomorrow i have to do a very important test for school. I have a certain high school diploma (in Holland you have differtent levels of high school) and with this diploma i can only enter a certain level of university. If i make this test, i don't need the appropriate high-school diploma but i can get straight into the high level of university. That would be sweet. It's been 9 years ago since i last went to school though, so fingers crossed!

Jeanie, on 10 February 2011 - 11:00 AM, said:

Definitely! Fingers crossed! I will be in Brussels tomorrow for business reasons but as it is closer to the Netherlands the sonic waves of wishing-good-luck and bonne chance (what's it in Dutch?) should reach you even better!

Aww thats so sweet! In dutch it's 'Succes!'

But wait, you are from germany right?

Jeanie, on 10 February 2011 - 05:18 PM, said:

I wasn't sure about that one. I have read about it. How do I pronounce it?

And, yes, Germany, right

Jeanie all the best of luck with your test!! School is the answer to many things. Once you're there, especially after such a long absence, the windows of opportunities and growth become so clear and wide.

As for struggles, these things will pass. It's just that sometimes it feels a bit like you've pitched a tent in purgatory. That's the hardest part for me anyway!

As far as sacrifice... well, I won't go into detail but I've learned a lot about it in the past 3 years. It's humbling and can be a selfless act for the benefit of others and ultimately yourself. As far as long term, I'd say the pros of sacrifice outweigh the immediate cons.

@ Goldenboy - it is pronounced as ´ suckses ´. This is not a joke!
@ Whirls - Well i dont want to jinx it...but the test wasn´t to hard. They will let me know within four weeks if i passed or failed.

I´m looking into the type of school i would like to go to now. I would love to be a TV host and i won´t give up on this dream, but being a TV host isn´t something you can achieve by going to school. You need to know the right people, and you need to get the right amount of luck! So i´m not gonna sit on my ass waiting for this to happen, instead i´m going back to school (home studies) and working. It won´t be easy, but it´s time to get real. I need an education and a job like everybody else. he modelling days are over!

So one of my passions is working with mentally disabled people. My uncle is mentally disabled ( i visit him every week) and it gives me so much energy to visit him and his mentally disabled housemates. I know it won´t be easy and it´s also a hard field to work in...but i am seriously considering of doing a 3 year course to be able to work with the mentally disabled.

Who thought 5 years ago, when i had quite the career as a model, that one day i would be going back to school? I didn´t. But i´ve gone trough a hard time in my life and i now realise it´s time for part 2 of my life. I´ve let go of the first part. And it feels good to realise you have let something go!

Oke i´ll get off my soapbox now

haha, jeanie, okay, then I have sent loads of "suckses" from brussels to you on friday. I hope everything went well.

I met up with some people from antwerp and maastricht on Saturday for business and it was a pleasure speaking some dutch with them even though I need to learn much more. but I really enjoy it, so will do, and in case we're getting to meet up some day we'll have a relaxed talk in dutch. yeah!

I'm so bored I actually watch the Grammys.

The performances have actually been OK so far! Although the Bob Dylan performance was underwhelming, to say the least. And Katy Perry was rather generic. I liked the show Cee-Lo put on though (Gwyneth Paltrow and all)!

@Jeans: Best of luck, amiga. You're a fantastic individual and I am sending you nothing but love and good energy.

@inchemwetrust: Patience. That sucks, though. I hate waiting on business for your financial means. Had that happen at one point with a company who delayed me two months in getting me a check for $9K when I did a whole bunch of work for them.

Ended up at an interesting invite-only party at a rented warehouse space in SOMA in San Franciscio last night. It was something of a cross between an office party and an underground rave. DJs were pretty good, though. Played a bunch of Boys Noize, Vitalic, and other fantastic electronic tracks.

Communal punch bowl + rum. Wasn't even hungover... awesome.

@ Pooter & Goldenboy: Thanks for the lovely words

I got my semester ! \o/ With a wonderful 6,5 out of 20 (32,5 %) at the contract law exam but nevermind, I passed that fucking semester !

The bloke off the internet, on 15 February 2011 - 06:01 AM, said:

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

I don't know what it is like with law exams in France, but average results here in Germany are always close to the infamous failing-border (you pass with 4 out of 18, you're happy when you have 4, you're lucky having 6+, you are GOD with 9+... a very strange system)

Congrats bloke! How many more semesters you got left now?

MadPooter, on 13 February 2011 - 11:31 PM, said:

A friend of mine and myself are starting up a small business very soon! My tax return was gonna be used to get the biz of the ground, but I just sorted that mess as of today. More details later!

My AC/DC laptop adapter went out days ago, so i'm using a friends laptop. And last night, My Ipod didn't turn on! so it's now a paperweight!

I have a headache again!

BoywiththeGoldenEyes, on 16 February 2011 - 08:17 AM, said:

I know a girl that had 15!!

I vaguely remember my first encounter with law lessons. It was part of my "pre-master" studies or rather prediploma and was called (roughly translated) private/civil law. I sucked big time and ended up having to repeat the course one more time. But I guess it was nothing compared to real law examns.

Thanks guys !

inchemwetrust, on 17 February 2011 - 03:28 AM, said:

3 more left before I get my degree. I made halfway through.

BoywiththeGoldenEyes, on 16 February 2011 - 08:17 AM, said:

In France you have several subjects and your general grade must be at least 10 out of 20. For example if you have 12 out of 20 in a subject and 8 out of 20 in another, it makes you 10 as a general grade and you can pass.
I had a total of 9 subjects and got at least 10 in each of them apart from civil law, where I got 6,5 at the exam. My general grade was 12.

I'll finally get to see Underworld live this summer!